Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Quality Time

As a single mom I try to pack everything in until capacity is full. Often times I miss something or can’t find things because I’m always frantically moving from one thing to the next. Lately my son has been more stubborn, cranky,  and frustrated than usual. He is constantly testing me and pushing the limits.  Often times I have been too tired to argue with him so it’s either time out or just let him get away with what he wants to do.  The same cycle has been playing itself out for weeks now because work is busy, school is busy, and life is just busy. So I let things slide that shouldn’t and we just flow through each day just getting by. As my constant busy schedule built up  my patience level went down as well as my sons. I started to let those important moments pass by and a gaping hole was developing  because we didn’t have those moments where we would just hang-- play games,  chase each other down in a game of tag or soar on the swings high as the tree tops.  I have been letting those important moments pass by with the frenzy of life and doing what I need to do.

It became apparent to me the other day when my son was irritable as usual and I was at the end of my rope. I was tempted to put him in time out for an hour but instead I reached down in the bucket of toys in the garage and found bubbles. Bubbles meant for a spring or summer day were now my distraction on a cool winter afternoon. Together we started blowing bubbles into the air, making bubble tornadoes flying up to the sky, counting how many bubbles were attaching themselves  to other bubbles. Both our frustrations drifted away as we laughed, took pictures and simply enjoyed quality time together. That is when I realized all the tantrums, the testing, the irritability was my sons longing to spend time with me- just hanging. There didn’t have to be an elaborate plan, we didn’t have to spend a bunch of money or buy a new toy. He just wanted time with me, and that is when sadness swept over me that I had let business get in the way of the most important thing of all- showing my son that time with him is better than anything else on the planet.  So the rest of the day we flew planes, played tag, soared on swings and spent some much needed time living in the moment instead of going through the motions….and I highly recommend it!

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